[ Ben does know, though. He knows where his anxieties lie, the cracks inside him, the shattered places. It's just... difficult to talk about. But Ben trusts Kieran, deeply.
So he sucks in a small breath and explains in a low voice: ]
He promised he wouldn't let me hurt him, but I guess - I spent so much of my life convinced I was evil and that anyone who got close to me would be in danger. Part of me is still worried. Cole is so... good, and I just. I couldn't live with myself if I made things worse for him, when he's already been through so much.
[ It's not the kind of worry that has an easy answer. Ben has been striving hard to unlearn all those things Reginald had taught him to think about himself, but the work is long and hard and some days it seems endless. ]
I guess all I can do is just... try to treat him right.
no subject
[ Ben does know, though. He knows where his anxieties lie, the cracks inside him, the shattered places. It's just... difficult to talk about. But Ben trusts Kieran, deeply.
So he sucks in a small breath and explains in a low voice: ]
He promised he wouldn't let me hurt him, but I guess - I spent so much of my life convinced I was evil and that anyone who got close to me would be in danger. Part of me is still worried. Cole is so... good, and I just. I couldn't live with myself if I made things worse for him, when he's already been through so much.
[ It's not the kind of worry that has an easy answer. Ben has been striving hard to unlearn all those things Reginald had taught him to think about himself, but the work is long and hard and some days it seems endless. ]
I guess all I can do is just... try to treat him right.