redmarsshit | test drive meme: november 2019

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test drive meme: november 2019

Redshift: Welcome to the v͖͕̺̲̘̱̜͎o̴̦̣̠̦̘̹͞i̯̖d̛̪̬͈̱̦̝͍̕.

▶ Click here to read what characters will experience when arriving in Anchor.

▶ All TDM threads can be considered game canon, and current players are welcome to either top-level on the TDM so prospective players can tag them, or use the prompts for logs or network posts on the communities. All threads on the TDM can be used for Activity Check.

a. the truth hurts.

As though everything happening in the past month wasn't enough, there's been a minor explosion in one of the labs. No one hurt, if you don't count the hapless maintenance bot that caused the explosion in the first place.

But there are gases drifting through the laboratories, some of them making their way into the air vents, invisible to the purifiers in the system thanks to the explosion. And those gases are leaking into the air around Anchor, little pockets of danger waiting to be breathed in.

Those who breathe the gasses in might be the unluckiest Anchorites of all.

They're stuck telling the whole truth and nothing but the truth for the next five hours, give or take. Good luck with that!

b. retromedia.

Oblivious to what's going on inside Anchor, the shift rages outside, bringing shadows of things and places from other worlds, those things flickering into existence and out of it again.

The bad news is that the Whole Foods is gone.

The good news is the shift left something behind in its place.

A long, squat building, with cement walls painted over with stucco and punctuated by big windows. A flat roof with slanted sides, painted a deep blue. In bold yellow letters bolted to the roof, a sign:

BLOCKBUSTER
The sliding doors are broken, bouncing open and shut steadily, but the inside is clean and well-stocked with rack upon rack upon row upon row of VHS tapes, all of them neatly packaged in plastic boxes. Some of them have the movie covers on them, but most bear the Blockbuster logo and tiny labels running down the back, declaring the box's contents. There's a giant, somewhat busted up standee of Tim Allen as The Santa Clause, flickering holiday lights strung unevenly from the ceiling, and symbols of various seasonal holidays stuck up along the walls and windows.

Any movie you could possibly want lies within, or at least any movie you could possibly want that was released on Earth during or before 1994. And don’t worry if you can't find a VHS player in Anchor! There are whole shelves of VCRs tucked into one of the closets, apparently part of an aborted plan to rent out VCRs along with movies.

Poor Blockbuster. They were innovators. And now they're lost to the sands of the red shift.

c. sweet sweet self-care.

While sickness persists inside Anchor's walls, those in recovery seem to be getting better every day. And while the health bots have been working overtime, some of their processes have gotten a little borked up from all the work they've been doing.

Along with medical care, they're now administering lectures to their captive audiences about the value of diet and exercise, the importance of personal hygiene, and the healing properties of massage. Some of them are forcing massages on people just to prove their point, which, y'know, could be a lot worse. At least they're good at massages?

The spa bots are getting in on the action, nagging the healthy to come for relaxation and decontamination in one gloriously bubbly swoop. They've converted several of their spa pools into sweet-smelling antibacterial baths, so you can make extra-sure you got those visiting-a-sick-friend cooties off!

No, seriously, go with them. Before they drag you there and make you take a bath like an unruly two-year-old.

Believe them, it's worth it. If you complete a circuit of the spa, including the antibacterial baths and the fresh and zesty decontamination shower, you get a shiny sparkly holographic sticker that says "YOU ARE FREE OF DISEASE" in little cheerful bubble-letters. They designed them all by themselves, totally from scratch. Are you proud?

d. the network.

Need to get hold of someone, call for help, ask the city at large a question? Need to ask a friend which 1980s teen movie classic to watch at movie night? Maybe you need to hold your sat phone up to whatever crazy thing you're seeing and send out a recording to double-check if your eyes are deceiving you and what you're looking at is real?

Whatever the reason, the network is going strong, so feel free to include a post to it in your top-levels.

Navigation.

Threaded | Top-Level Comments Only

[voice to text | @SCARAMOUCHE]

Could you patch up a radiation suit or two? Give 'em an upgrade while you're at it?

You did make your original inquiry to the general public, did you not?

"Yeah. I think she's been feeling better." She says she is, anyway. She could just be trying to keep him from worrying so much. And dude, nobody's gonna fuck with a ninja that has cute stickers and charms hanging off the things he's going to kill you with, that ninja obviously fears nothing.

"They uh, the robots can be a little weird sometimes. I don't know if it's a glitch in their programming, or if they'd just been without human interaction for so long and they're just overly excited, or what. They don't seem dangerous, at least, but if they get that way I might have to put 'em down. ... Shut 'em down. For-- for repairs, not like, robot murder. That sounded a little dark."

[ arya laughs. ]

You mean yours aren't? Then your music just isn't good enough!

[ arya punches the air, for demonstration. the conversation is getting deep, but she's having a good time.

it takes arya a moment to respond to genji's question. there are no police in westeros, but there are those who uphold the law, and the distinction is a little hazy for the local medieval preteen. ]

They don't look like anything. There are no police. There are the gold cloaks of the City Watch, in King's Landing, and they are kind of like police, sort of. In other places it's up to knights to uphold their Lord's law. Or swordspeople. Or worse. [ arya thinks about the faceless men. they're too hard to explain, so she moves on. ] But they protect the laws they want to protect. Really, it's up to you to protect yourself.

What are they like in yours?

[Peter doesn't actually look too concerned. He's tapping his fork against his plate and looking around at nothing in particular hMMMM]

See, this is gonna make me sound like a real asshole, but right now I'm trying to think of how I can use this to my advantage, against Qubit specifically. He locked me out of my lab once, and I'm still pissed about it. Like, I don't normally hold grudges, but oooooh man that just-- that really got under my skin.

[that bastard guy. Peter's going to sit here and grump for a few more seconds before turning his attention back to Ben]

Uh. Ffffff. Well, based on what we know, which isn't much, I wanna say that whatever caused this is airborne. And if that's the case, the best thing we can do is let the ventilation systems do their job and cycle the contaminated air through the filtration system. Until then, I guess now's the time to really get to know me because now I can't lie and I wish I hadn't said that but it is what it is.

Maybe it's only the elder mages who are wise. You're just learning how to be wise right now.

I make stupid choices sometimes too.

[ arya would never call herself stupid -- that's her favorite insult! another score for the truth gas. still, she's glad reynir agrees with her that boys are gross. that's the thinking person's opinion, after all. ]

But if souls can be twisted, they can be changed. [ to arya's horror, she continues to type, then send: ]

I was taken in by a kindly man, who gave me food and a roof and a place to sleep and hid me from those who wanted me dead and taught me to fight. In exchange he wanted me to change my soul, I think. I had to become no one. Not a person, but a servant of Him of Many Faces. It worked, for a time, until I escaped to the Clock, and then to here, and sometimes when I am scared or alone I feel like I am becoming no one again.

[ once the message sends, a confused and upset and frightened arya throws the phone against the nearest wall. it breaks into pieces, and she makes her way up to the arrival area to get a new one. that should fix everything, right? it's just the phone, it's not something happening to her.

she finds a new one, and enters her username to read reynir's next message. ]

See, I figured I'd specify since I've met a lot of different aliens who are roughly the same size as humans. I'm sayin' the style is really human-like, not just the size.

[But now he's just arguing because he can. SIGH okay back to the important stuff.]

But yeah, that's what happened. From what we've heard, people used to just appear at random on the planet's surface and either die or mutate because of the radiation. All the portal here does is funnel people into Anchor instead.

[Lambs are always the most truthful and Anne is an angel. Lalli eyes her with some distaste.

Then he folds his arms and doesn't actually intend to say anything, but something bursts out of his mouth anyway.]

I don't want to be in the apartment.

[He freezes, his eyes flicking briefly to Reynir's face to see his reaction, and doesn't clap his hands over his mouth, but he definitely wants to. That wasn't a thought he'd meant to voice.]

Does a krogan have four testicles?

Absolutely.

Expect everyone is playing to their strengths. Can't expect every person to walk around like they were born with an omni-tool on their arm.

That's adequate once you take into account that some people's strengths are... less than impressive.

[ But this person sounds like they have some sense. ]

You're familiar working on ships?

"That is good. And maybe once you have had it you become immune for the future so she won't have it again?" Which doesn't bode well for Genji who didn't get sick either time. He's not even sure he has an immune system anymore.

"They do seem very happy to see us. And yes, that sounded grim, but.." He trails off trying to figure out how to say: you seem so unthreatening, in a way that isn't an insult. Fortunately he hasn't breathed in all the truth gas yet so he's able to finish that off with, "You don't seem the type to go on a murderous rampage against robots."

Sure am. Every quarian worth their salt knows how to take a ship apart and put it back together blindfolded.

[ Hm. Not a species name that Starscream recognizes, but he's begun to think that's the new standard while stuck in this place. ]

Quite a bold claim. If your skills translate well to other mechanical systems, you should find no shortage of projects here.

I--

[While Kal'Reegar is really not against being rescued in this scenario, he's also generally against having things stuck on his exo-suit unless he's putting them there himself. Thus, his hand is half way to the thing to take it off before the young human speaks, and he hesitates.]

Huh.

[He almost feels a little sorry for the robot. Might actually feel sorry for it if it hadn't been trying to pull him into the baths.]

Thanks. What's got them so focused on getting everyone in there?

Partially. It hides the cybernetics but also people don't look at me with fear when they cannot see what I truly look like. Or worse, pity.

[Yep that's sure a thing he just said.]

I can't walk without it.

[Hahaha. Yep. Admit a weakness to a sort of stranger. This is fine!!!]

I have no idea why I just told you that.

[He's retreated with his back against a wall as if what he's saying might physically harm them. What the hell is going on? And judging from Ben's reaction he's having the same issue. So it's less likely that Ben did something to him and more likely something that affects everyone.]

I take it you did not want to say that either?

[Can they talk about the weather? This is terrible.]

[ Starscream is instantly reminded of Swindle with that remark, and regards Kabal calculatingly. An opportunist can always be useful in the right circumstances. ]

I think you'll find I'm not so easily handled.

Most organic species are small.

Yes, well, this portal seems to have missed the memo in my case... how fortunate I have no need to be concerned by radiation.

[ That was... mostly true. There were still certain types, and extreme levels, that could affect Cybertronians. But broadly speaking, he didn't have anything to fear by the amounts humans had to worry about. ]

And you're... what? The welcoming committee?

Lalli is not in the Blockbuster to look for Genji, he is there to investigate what the deal is with these strange "video tapes". However, he'd been meaning to say something to Genji ever since the Incident anyway, so from a certain point of view it's fortuitous to run into him here.

Still, it's... surreal to find someone who looks like Genji kicking back to watch cartoons. Lalli's still not even sure what's up with televisions, so there's a lot about the scene he just can't really process and for a good few seconds he just stops where he stands and stares, looking remarkably like a deer caught in headlights.

Then, without even meaning to, he says, "Genji." (That's what he said his name was, right?) "I wanted to say sorry."

Stupid mouth. What is going on?

I have heard of it, after all!

[ That least, he's heard of Japan. And he'd seen that small part of it that had been Genji's home, when it was brought through by the shift. That wasn't Tokyo, though. Unless Hanamura was a neighborhood or something IN Tokyo. Honestly, there's still a lot Reynir doesn't know. But he knows a hell of a lot more than he had before he'd come here. ]

I'm from Earth too, though probably a different one than yours.

[ He's just guessing since Majima doesn't know about mages. And also he's, like, alive. ]

Witches are mean old ladies. Mages can be anyone that the gods choose.

You gave up the right to participate in that public conversation when you decided to be a dick and rant about stuff I wasn't even talking about.
But I'm guessing you haven't got a whole lot of friends to complain to so you're stuck with whining at random strangers huh?
Kind of sad if you ask me.

[ Some of it might be down to cultural misunderstanding, but Reynir isn't really sure that a guy who took someone in and then tried to change their soul somehow for some reason could be described as kindly. He has so many questions it is hard to know where to start.

First, perhaps, establish some context. ]

Is 'Him of Many Faces' the name of one of your gods?

I don't think I really understand what you're talking about, I'm sorry. I'm not sure how a person could be no one. Everybody is someone.

It sounds like becoming no one is sort of not fun, though? If it happens when you're feeling scared. Or is it - some kind of spiritual solace?

[ Other religions are weird so Reynir's trying not to be a dick here in case this is stuff she thinks is perfectly fine, but this is all sounding sketch as hell to him. ]

[ Reynir just blinks, confused. He gets that Lalli doesn't enjoy being cooped up, but this sounds more specific than his general restlessness. This sounds like he's avoiding it for a particular reason. And so, head tilting a little to the side, Reynir asks: ]

How come?

[ Lalli seems kind of upset? Kind of worried? Reynir isn't sure if something happened, if someone had upset him. If that's the case, Reynir wants to know it, and know if there's anything he can do to help. They might not be as close as some other members of the expedition had been with one another, or as close as Reynir has become with Onni since they came here, but he still doesn't want Lalli to be unhappy. ]

Hey, I ain't old. And no one's ever accused me of bein' a lady.

[ Although he probably would be one, lbr. He was still more classy than trashy glam. ]

So it's got somethin' to do with divine intervention, huh? Can't say that leaves me with a much clearer picture than before. Dreams ain't really my specialty, either.

[ Ben would absolutely call Five crazy to his face for a single corn chip, but that's not really the most important point right now. He's not here, and presumably neither is Arya's brother, so much more concerning is... ]

I didn't mean to say what I said, either. I mean, it's true, but I wasn't gonna tell you. I don't talk to people about my family because it always ends badly. I don't want to be saying any of this.

[ WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON.

A feeling that is only intensified when this kid says she's been trained, by some group he's never heard of in a place he's also never heard of, and that she wouldn't hurt herself. Then, Ben's expression shifts from worry to something much different. Kids playing with knives isn't great! It's universally recognized! He'd done the right thing, trying to get her to stop.

But something that is far less universal, but far more intimately familiar to Ben, is children that have been taught how to use knives well enough that they're no danger to themselves. Diego had been doing tricks like that by the time he was Arya's age and younger. The parallel is impossible to ignore, when she says she's hurt lots of people before. Ben's shoulders slump, and he looks, not horrified, but so so sad, and tired. ]

Oh. So you're like me.

[ No... this isn't the tactic he should take. She's just a kid, she doesn't need to hear about his bullshit. He should be approaching this some different way, some better way. But he can't stop that truth from spilling out. ]

Someone trained me to hurt people, too, when I was a kid. Lots and lots of people. I tried to keep count at first but then I couldn't.

Threaded | Top-Level Comments Only

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test drive meme: november 2019

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