Ben blinks in surprise when Cole sets a hand against his stomach - that one is still taking a bit of getting used to. He has just a moment to wonder if Cole is going to communicate with Them, but then he doesn't have to wonder, because Cole's speaking aloud and even if the words aren't for him, Ben hears them. He only registers his own hunger right at that moment when Cole promises that food is coming. A cold flood of understanding moves through Ben when Cole promises Them that he won't be starved.
He is grateful for it, being known the way Cole knows him, without him needing to say anything. But it does catch him off guard sometimes.
Swallowing, Ben tenses, taking a minute to just... register the implications of what Cole's said. He had been speaking like this earlier, in the Pit - reinforcing that They want to keep him safe, that They feel what he feels, not just vice versa. For so many years Ben had believed that They were rageful, savage, thoughtless, and that all the things Reginald put him through were necessary to learn to keep Their nature in check. But what Cole's been implying - and keeps implying now - is that the opposite is true. That that rage was a response to Reginald, not just because They were impacted, but out of some kind of concern for Ben, as well.
That thought takes the wind out of him. He's more aware of that aching feeling in his belly, and it only amplifies the confusion and sadness and guilt that Ben feels. He nods absently, detaching himself gently from Cole and getting to his feet. He should have been more careful. He usually is so careful, to have a snack with him, to eat regularly. For a long time he'd thought of it as measures that were necessary to keep himself from being more influenced by these murderous predators inside him. But actually, had he just been keeping Them from remembering the times Reginald had made him go without meals, something that was apparently distressing to Them?
"Sorry."
He doesn't know who he's apologizing to - to Them or to Cole or to both. The guilt he's feeling is as strong as it is nebulous. He's really just sure all this is his fault somehow, that things are bad and he's made them that way, even if he hadn't meant to. Ben hunches into himself slightly, stomach growling, now, at this inopportune time. He shifts his weight from foot to foot, then asks Cole.
"Do you... know if we'll be able to get into the mess hall?"
Ben doesn't really want to go back to the goop festival, after all that. But if it's the only option for places to find food right now, it's better than nothing.
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He is grateful for it, being known the way Cole knows him, without him needing to say anything. But it does catch him off guard sometimes.
Swallowing, Ben tenses, taking a minute to just... register the implications of what Cole's said. He had been speaking like this earlier, in the Pit - reinforcing that They want to keep him safe, that They feel what he feels, not just vice versa. For so many years Ben had believed that They were rageful, savage, thoughtless, and that all the things Reginald put him through were necessary to learn to keep Their nature in check. But what Cole's been implying - and keeps implying now - is that the opposite is true. That that rage was a response to Reginald, not just because They were impacted, but out of some kind of concern for Ben, as well.
That thought takes the wind out of him. He's more aware of that aching feeling in his belly, and it only amplifies the confusion and sadness and guilt that Ben feels. He nods absently, detaching himself gently from Cole and getting to his feet. He should have been more careful. He usually is so careful, to have a snack with him, to eat regularly. For a long time he'd thought of it as measures that were necessary to keep himself from being more influenced by these murderous predators inside him. But actually, had he just been keeping Them from remembering the times Reginald had made him go without meals, something that was apparently distressing to Them?
"Sorry."
He doesn't know who he's apologizing to - to Them or to Cole or to both. The guilt he's feeling is as strong as it is nebulous. He's really just sure all this is his fault somehow, that things are bad and he's made them that way, even if he hadn't meant to. Ben hunches into himself slightly, stomach growling, now, at this inopportune time. He shifts his weight from foot to foot, then asks Cole.
"Do you... know if we'll be able to get into the mess hall?"
Ben doesn't really want to go back to the goop festival, after all that. But if it's the only option for places to find food right now, it's better than nothing.